Don’t let the door hit you in your fat ass, you squinty cockholster.
~Fin~
Observations From Someone Who Knows 360 Different Ways to Kill You
Don’t let the door hit you in your fat ass, you squinty cockholster.
~Fin~
No, we’re not dead. Just being all invisible, as is our habit from time to time.
We will be adding more content shortly, but for now…join our ESPN Bowl Mania group. Yes, it requires patronizing the WWL’s website which is tragic, but tradition is tradition.
Group: Buckeye Ninja
Password: faturkel
The Bye Week. What is there to talk about during a bye week? Well, good job so far, fellas. A very good job so far. As we all know, these battlin’ Buckeyes of our’s will be going into the Wisconsin game with an unblemished record, 10-0. So I decided to pick the bye week to have a short little discussion (with myself) about going into the eleventh game of the season and being 10-0. The Buckeyes have played an 11th game of the season for the past 40 years. Every year from 1972 on has seen an 11th game. Then you have to go all the way back to 1905 to see another 11th game. And there was a 12th game in that 8-2-2 season. 1904 had eleven games, including a loss to the Carlisle Indians a few years before Jim Thorpe enrolled. In 1903 OSU was 8-3. In 1896 we were 5-5-1. In 1894 we were 6-5. In all, the Ohio State Buckeyes are 47-47-1 in games eleven and beyond (24-20-1 in 11th games only). That’s not too bad considering many of those games were bowl games and Cooper era Michigan games.
We have only been 10-0 going into that 11th game seven times. Well, eight, including this season. And we’ve been undefeated ten times. And in how many of those nine previous undefeated seasons did we finish with an undefeated record? Two times. 2002′s national championship season, and 1973′s Rose Bowl-winning, USC-defeating, 10-0-1 season. Of course, this season is different. We have “nothing” to play for. Well, we have an undefeated season to play for. We have The Game to play for, which is a lot considering that it IS the most important game of the season. And now on November 17th, if we needed something else to play for, we can be playing for only the sixth 11-0 record in our history. Go Bucks!
When you’re as lazy and shiftless as we are, you end up watching a lot of college football on Saturdays. It’s pretty awesome. So Ye Olde Buckeye and The Buckeye Ninja have collaborated on a top 25 poll.
Trust us, We’ve got Excel spreadsheets and shit.
As always, any complaints about this or any of our other content can be brought up with Ye Olde Buckeye at his Twitter account. First-place votes are in parentheses.
| 2012 Buckeye Ninja Poll – Week 11 (Nov. 5) | ||
|---|---|---|
| Rank | Team | Total Points |
| 1 | Alabama (2) | 50 |
| 2 | Kansas St | 47 |
| 2 (tie) | Oregon | 47 |
| 4 | Ohio State | 44 |
| 5 | Notre Dame | 42 |
| 6 | Georgia | 38 |
| 7 | LSU | 37 |
| 7 (tie) | Florida State | 37 |
| 9 | Florida | 36 |
| 10 | Oregon State | 29 |
| 10 (tie) | Clemson | 29 |
| 10 (tie) | Stanford | 29 |
| 13 | Texas A&M | 25 |
| 14 | South Carolina | 24 |
| 15 | Oklahoma | 21 |
| 15 (tie) | Nebraska | 21 |
| 15 (tie) | Louisville | 21 |
| 18 | Texas | 15 |
| 19 | USC | 13 |
| 20 | Texas Tech | 12 |
| 21 | UCLA | 10 |
| 22 | Northwestern | 8 |
| 22 (tie) | That Team Up North | 8 |
| 24 | Mississippi State | 3 |
| 25 | Louisiana Tech | 2 |
Also receiving votes: Toledo (1), Ohio (1), West Virginia (1)
Thoughts (Buckeye Ninja) - The top 5 remains unchanged and everything else basically gets shuffled around a bit. Four teams made our top 25 from the B1G, and a fifth (Wisky) is sitting just outside. They might make it into the poll in time for the game in two weeks. We shall see. YOB is still more bullish on the middle of the SEC than we are – outside of LSU and Alabama all we see are several good but not great teams. The only reason they’re ranked as highly as they are is simply that no one is any better this year. More on this phenomenon later.
Go!
Illinois at Ohio State
3:30 Eastern/1:30 Mountain (ESPN)
We don’t want to step on YOB’s excellent post so this will be short and sweet.
Illinois is turrible. In our scientific NCAA 13 Buckeye Result Prediction Trials, the Fightin’ Buckeyes of the Olentangy won handily 28-13. It wasn’t a huge win but Simon and Hankins basically ate Scheelhaase alive. Which could totally happen tomorrow.
Also the Buckeye offense false started on the first play of the game and the defense gave up a stupid touchdown when they allowed a TE to get wide open deep in the first quarter. Who says video games aren’t realistic?
Our guaranteed* prediction: OSU 42, Illinois 10

Red Grange was chosen as the Big Ten’s greatest icon by the Big Ten Network. I would have preferred that it be Woody Hayes, Archie Griffin, or Chic Harley (who wasn’t even included!), but I can’t complain too much about the choice of Grange. I’m just glad it wasn’t Bo Sklembachlor or Tom Osborne (since the BTN is so dead set on trying to convince the world that all of Nebraska and Penn State’s histories are relevant to Big Ten fans).
Harold Edward “Red” Grange was born in Forksville, Pennsylvania in 1903, but his family moved to Wheaton, Illinois when he was five. He was a high school, college, and pro football star, commentator, and some time actor. The day after his final college football game (against Ohio State) he and player/coach George Halas agreed terms for a contract with the Chicago Bears. Apparently he did alright for himself, but I’m more concerned with his school days.

After being a four sport star at Wheaton High School, earning 16 varsity letters in football, basketball, baseball, and track, he enrolled at the University of Illinois with the intention of competing only in basketball and track. He scored three touchdowns against Nebraska in his first game for the Illini, who went on to go undefeated and win the 1923 national championship – as did Fielding Yost’s Michigan team, since the teams didn’t play each other in that year’s Big Ten schedule. They did play in 1924 though, and every Buckeye should be a Red Grange fan for what he did to the defending national champion Wolverines in Memorial Stadium’s opening game. First, he returned the opening kickoff 95 yards for a touchdown. Then, he scored on a 67 yard run, again on a 56 yard run, and again on a 44 yard run, all in the game’s first 12 minutes. Those four touchdowns equaled the amount of touchdowns that Michigan had allowed during the entirety of the previous two seasons. He then sat out the second quarter (showing more mercy than the ugly northerners deserved), then returned for another touchdown run and passed for a sixth. One must assume that the mercy rule was enacted because the game ended 39-14. Grange’s 402-yard outburst was more than enough to give the sun and blue their first loss since the 1921 Ohio State game in Ann Arbor. ESPN and others claim that this game inspired Grantland Rice to give him the nickname “The Galloping Ghost”, but Grange said that Chicago sportswriter Warren Brown came up with the name. Rice did call him a “gray ghost” in a description of the 1924 game with Michigan. Also after this game, the Chicago Tribune said, “They knew he was coming; they saw him start; he made no secret of his direction; he was in their midst, and he was gone!” In the 20 games he played for Illinois, he ran for 3,362 yards, received for 253, and threw for 575.
Kickoff return TD vs Michigan
But back to Wheaton High School. In his junior year he scored 36 touchdowns while his team went undefeated. In his senior year his team only lost one game. In that game, a 39-0 loss to Toledo’s Scott High School, Grange was knocked out and remained unconscious for two days. Such is the power of Toledo. That Scott High School team was chosen by the National Sports News Service as the national champion. Take that, Illinois!


When the Ohio University Bobcats met the Miami University RedHawks at Yager Stadium in The Battle of the Bricks this past weekend, there were more important facts and statistics involved than Ohio’s ranking in the polls. Ohio….and I am talking about Ohio University, located in Athens, Ohio. The one from the Mid-American Conference. The one called the Bobcats. I know it’s difficult for some, uh, slower people to recognize that there’s a difference, but….Oh! So you’re saying he’s NOT stupid, but is in fact trying to get under our skin? Oh! Well, very well done, sir. Clever. You sure got us. Anyway…. Ohio University was ranked twice this year, at 25th in week 7 then at 23rd in week 8. Prior to this year, the Bobcats were last ranked for seven straight weeks in 1968. And that’s it. They were never ranked before that. No doubt they would have been ranked if the AP Poll existed in 1915, a year when the only blemish to their 8-1 record came at the hands of the Redskins of Miami (I still believe that when Miami changed their mascot it should have been to a redskin potato).


How about Miami? They have had far more success on the football field. Overall, Miami is 651-395-44, which compares favorably to Ohio’s 516-525-48. Miami is 7-3 in bowl games, compared to Ohio’s 1-5. Ohio’s lone bowl victory was against Utah State. Miami has defeated the likes of Texas Tech, Arizona State, and today’s fairly successful SEC teams South Carolina, Georgia, and Florida. Then, of course, Miami has seen some big names in the football world come through its program either as player or coach, including Clifton’s Woody Hayes, Barberton’s turncoat Bo Schembechler, Akron’s Ara Parseghian, Norwalk’s Paul Brown, Loudonville’s Ron Zook, Troy’s gone too soon Randy Walker, Toledo’s John Harbaugh, and Lima’s QB with a predilection (allegedly) for non-consensual sex Ben Roethlisberger. All Ohioans. They were champions four times in the Ohio Athletic Conference, three times in the Buckeye Conference, and fifteen times in the Mid-American Conference. They featured in the AP Poll in 1955, 1973, 1974, 1975, 1976, and 2003, being ranked as high as 10th in two different seasons.
So what is the greater significance of these two schools, one in which Ohio University leads the way? They are the first and second colleges founded in Ohio. Better than that, Ohio University was the first university established in the Northwest Territory and is the ninth oldest public university in the United States, being founded in 1804. It was conceived in the late 18th century, chartered as the American Western University in 1802, then founded one year after Ohio became the first state created out of the Northwest Territory, the 17th in all. Miami University, founded in 1809, is the tenth oldest public university in the United States. It was originally mentioned in an Act of Congress signed by President George Washington (therefore also in the 18th century), but was not passed by the Ohio General Assembly until 1809, and they didn’t get their first president until 1824, which was also when their first classes were held. The school closed in 1873, only to be re-opened in 1885 when it paid off its debts.

So where do these two schools stand in the greater picture? Obviously there were colleges founded in the colonial era, including the Ivy League schools and others including The College of William and Mary and Rutgers. But, outside of the original colonies, where do they stand? I’m glad you asked. As far as I could tell, there were four colleges founded before Ohio University outside of the original colonies (if we’re counting the colonies as not including their western-stretching claims. West of the Appalachian Mountain Range, let’s say). Kentucky’s Transylvania University (1780) was the first college west of the Allegheny Mountains, and the 16th university in the United States. ”Transylvania” means “across the woods”, and it was across the forest from Virginia in its Transylvania colony. Tennessee’s Tusculum College (1794) is the 23rd oldest operating college in the United States. The University of Tennessee (also 1794) was founded as Blount College two years before Tennessee became a state. In 1807 UT was rechartered as East Tennessee College. Finally, the University of Louisville (1798) was the first city-owned public university in the United States. It was founded as Jefferson Seminary, and didn’t actually open until 1813. Now you know. And knowing is half the battle.

When you’re as lazy and shiftless as we are, you end up watching a lot of college football on Saturdays. It’s pretty awesome. So Ye Olde Buckeye and The Buckeye Ninja have collaborated on a top 25 poll. The only thing we agreed on was Alabama at #1 and (strangely) Boise at #24. The points are just the average between our placements – for example YOB had Georgia #6 (20 points) and we had them at #9 (17 points) giving them their total of 37.
Trust us, We’ve got Excel spreadsheets and shit.
Any complaints about this or any of our other content can be brought up with Ye Olde Buckeye at his Twitter account. First-place votes are in parentheses.
| 2012 Buckeye Ninja Poll – Week 10 (Oct. 29) | ||
|---|---|---|
| Rank | Team | Total Points |
| 1 | Alabama (2) | 50 |
| 2 | Kansas St | 47 |
| 2 (tie) | Oregon | 47 |
| 4 | Ohio St | 43 |
| 4 (tie) | Notre Dame | 43 |
| 6 | Georgia | 37 |
| 7 | Florida | 35 |
| 7 (tie) | Oregon St | 35 |
| 7 (tie) | Florida St | 35 |
| 10 | LSU | 33 |
| 11 | Clemson | 32 |
| 12 | Stanford | 25 |
| 13 | Texas A&M | 24 |
| 13 (tie) | Mississippi St | 24 |
| 15 | South Carolina | 22 |
| 16 | Louisville | 21 |
| 17 | Oklahoma | 17 |
| 17 (tie) | Texas Tech | 17 |
| 17 (tie) | Nebraska | 17 |
| 20 | West Virginia | 13 |
| 20 (tie) | USC | 13 |
| 22 | UCLA | 7 |
| 22 (tie) | Louisiana Tech | 7 |
| 24 | Boise St | 4 |
| 25 | Northwestern | 1 |
| 25 (tie) | Arizona | 1 |
Thoughts (Buckeye Ninja) – we’re not convinced the SEC, outside of Alabama, is as dominant as it has been of late. Georgia, LSU, and South Carolina (even before Lattimore’s injury) seemed like good but flawed teams, but unfortunately all they’re doing right now is beating up on each other so it’s difficult to see where they stand compared to the rest of the country. Florida was – to us – by far the second best team in conference, but we couldn’t rank them ahead of Georgia after last weekend. We ranked Florida State and Clemson higher than YOB did, probably because we’re idiots. Brasky seems properly rated – around 15 or so, even though its defense can be a dumpster fire at times.
Also, looks like we need a third writer to break all these ties.

So, those of us in the Buckeye Nation were informed recently that we have a rivalry with Penn State. Huh. Who knew? Penn State and wikipedia, apparently. I mean, I’ve had a general dislike of them since they entered into the Big Ten universe, but I never considered them to be anything other than a regular conference rival, like Indiana. Rivalry by proximity, I guess. Personally, and I know everyone has their own feelings on the subject, my ranking of Ohio State’s rivals goes as follows: 1) TTUN, 2) Wisconsin (I was there when Ron Dayne ran all over our field, and it hurt), 3) Illinois, 4) the rest of the Big Ten, led by Michigan State, Penn State, or whoever is good that year. I guess Purdue’s up there too since we’ve had some trouble with them lately. And their engineering program is just so damn good!
I used to think favorably of Penn State. I liked their history and tradition. I had a soft spot in my heart for Joe Paterno, and I wanted him to lead in all-time victories. He was little, old, and talked funny. What’s not to like? Then their fans (or, I should say, a small percentage of them) just became so obnoxious. Most of us have seen the video of the Ohio State fan being pelted with beer cans. I still didn’t hate their team much, just some of their fans. Then, after the whole Sandusky nightmare was brought to the world’s attention, I started to feel sorry for the majority of their fans, and of course for the victims. But do annoying fans, proximity, and only playing them 27 times in 100 years make for a big rivalry? I don’t think so. Maybe if we play them every year for the next 100 years.
There is one area where we have a rivalry: Recruiting. Both states are breeding grounds for high school football talent. Although we have each snatched players from the other’s state, neither school has a 2013 commitment from the other’s state yet. There are quite a few potential recruits who are undecided and currently considering both Ohio State and Penn State. Here’s some of their info (thanks to espn):
The Nebraska game was a really big day for recruiting for Ohio State, maybe second only to The Game. But this should be a pretty important one too. It would be really nice to put on a show for any of these potential recruits who make it to the game (or are watching on tv), like at the Nebraska game. Winning is, of course, the most important thing, but it would be nice if we could get away from the stressful, ugly play that almost hurt us in the last two games. 2014 recruit Thaddeus Snodgrass (Springfield, OH) went to the Purdue game and is still considering OSU and PSU. It would be really nice to put on a better offensive performance, but I would love to see a more commanding defensive performance like those we became accustomed to during the Tressel era. The recruits are watching, and it would be nice to win the game AND the recruiting rivalry.